A wonderful woman and a great inspiration to me talks about Big Pink Hearts, Peter Kay and taking responsibility.
What is it that keeps you motivated in life?
That's a hard question because it varies so much! With BigPinkHeart some of my motivation comes from meeting other inspirational people and people who also want to be involved in making a difference for the better (like yourself!). BigPinkHeart was formed in 2008 and I was initially motivated by not only my own passion but by the fact that things just 'happened' for us along the way which made it feel that it was meant to be! Don't get me wrong, there probably have been more downs than ups in the last few years and things certainly don't get any easier. But when times feel really hard and things appear to be going nowhere, a door suddenly opens, something positive happens (big or small) which picks up our spirits and reminds us that not everything in life comes easily and when successes happen they are all the more wonderful because of the efforts that have been put in!
I think I'm quite a passionate person and when I put my mind to something I keep at it until I finish.
How have times changed since when you were growing up to now that your children are growing up?
Enormously! I think children nowadays have less freedom than we did. Stranger danger situations existed when we were young but we were unaware of it because it wasn't heavily publicised in the media. There was more a sense of innocence 30/40/50 years ago - gangs existed but were less 'feral'; authority was respected more (and those in authority sometimes abused this respect, just like today); there wasn't the craving for 'celebrity' status as there is today; children were 'children' and this was something that was cherished rather than expecting them to act older; 'community spirit' was very much in existence - we knew our neighbours and people helped each other more by being more aware of those who lived nearby. Life was generally slower and less congested - there were far fewer cars on the road, the population wasn't as big as it is nowadays. Junk food didn't exist when I was a child - hamburgers were alien to us! Fish and Chips was probably the main junk food of the day and this was a real treat at the weekend! We spent more time outside than in because there wasn't much on TV (we only had 3 channels before Channel 4 started!) and there were no computers. TV programmes were even more innocent than they are today - swearing just didn't exist on telly and 'naughty scenes' were left to the imagination!
However, life moves on - technology develops and communities grow. Parents and even grand-parents have to work harder and longer to keep their heads above the water. Young people have access to wonderful resources for learning and we can now communicate with people all over the world at the touch of a button. We don't have to wait 3 days for that letter to arrive. Still, I think we have lost a wonderful era of innocence and I wonder whether my children would like to experience a week of life in the 1960s or 1970s!
Why do you think it is important that children learn about the dangers of the world and others?
It's incredibly important for children to understand that there are dangers outside of their family and sometimes the dangers are within their own families. Children should not be made to suffer at the hands of others or be made to feel guilty for something that has been done to them in order to protect the person who has committed the abuse/offence. Adults need to be more aware of any changes that they notice in a child - a sudden withdrawal, a change in personality, etc. I think it is so important to keep in touch with our own children so that they know they can talk about anything that is upsetting them and they won't be shouted at or judged. I know that life can be hectic and as adults we tend to sometimes bury our heads in the sand. Perhaps we need to cram less into our days and rethink our priorities. A child needs protection, a child needs to know that it is loved and cherished, a child needs to know it is valued and what he/she has to say will be heard. If a child has more understanding from an early age about what is acceptable and what is not acceptable, what are appropriate boundaries, then they will been given vital tools to understand when something is wrong and hopefully there will be a responsible adult with whom they can speak and voice their concerns/fears.
Why do you want Big Pink Hearts to make a difference?
BigPinkHeart was created to try and get people to work together to bring about a change for the better - a return to an era of 'community' and where people valued life and each other. A civil society can only work when people/communities work as a team. In my personal opinion, I don't see a lot of this 'teamwork' happening on a weekly basis but I do see that when this country is in trouble people work wonderfully together to help each other. Well, if this can happen during times of say the recent riots, why can't it happen more regularly? The British have always been known for their fighting spirit and pulling together. BigPinkHeart wants to be able to contribute to reducing anti-social behaviour and isolation, working in partnership with other organisations and communities, to make a change for the better and I think, with a concerted effort, this will happen but it will take a while!
What is it do you think the reason why the youth of today have lost respect not only for themselves but others?
I don't think we can blame the youth for losing respect - they have to learn from experience and I think that the adult population has to accept some of the blame. When a child sees an adult acting in a disrespectful manner - shouting at someone in the street, shouting at a teacher, a shop assistant, or getting into fights with others, then it is natural that this child will think this is an appropriate way to act! It is always so much easier to blame others for our bad behaviour but we need to stop passing the buck! The ultimate in lack of respect was evidenced by the riots that took over this country in August this year. Yes, I think there is a general unrest within this country and also an element of 'boredom' but it was wrong for those who took part in the riots to kill innocent people, ransack businesses and burn down homes and destroy lives of hardworking people. What did that achieve? How will those actions make a change for the better? They won't! Those most obscene acts of disrespect have only added to the bad press that our young people have already been branded with. However, we must remember that when we saw the media coverage of the riots we were not only seeing young people, we were seeing adults behaving in a 'feral' manner. So, us adults need to start leading by example! Our young generation should be helped to feel good about themselves rather than being labelled as 'trouble makers'. I have no idea what the answer is but I do know that something has to be done now to stop the rot getting any worse. I think it boils down to personal values. If we have good self-esteem, good manners, confidence, tolerance, understanding, belief in ourselves, consideration for others, then we have the foundations to build Respect and when we feel Respect for ourselves we will then be able to show it to others. Now, rather than point the finger at today's youth and ask them to show Respect to others, we should point the finger at ourselves and ask the same question. I'm certainly not saying that young people are blameless, but I am saying that adults aren't!
Away from work, what things interest you?
I love being with family and spending time with friends! I'm an avid reader! I have two dogs and really enjoy going on long walks with them. My ideal holiday is going somewhere that has history as well as sunshine and sand. A recent holiday was spent in Turkey and I was fascinated by the local history and discovering that there was a castle still intact that dated back to the Crusades! I also love laughing until my sides hurt - good friends and family can achieve this as well as Peter Kay!
If you could be any celebrity in the world who would you be and why?
Can I chose someone who is no longer alive? Well, if I can, then it would be Audrey Hepburn - what an inspirational and BigPinkHearted woman she was! Beautiful, talented, a survivor and worked hard for the sake of others. She also appeared not to be tainted by her celebrity status. Awesome! If I have to chose someone who is living, then it would have to be Peter Kay! OK, I know he's a man and I'm a woman but in my humble opinion he is fantastic! Again, a very BigPinkHearted person, a family man and also close to his parents and grand-parents. His ability to make people laugh is enviable - he's a natural! His charitable work is amazing and he doesn't appear to want any of the glory for himself. He really does make a difference to people's lives!
Generations, are increasingly growing but what would you like to see happen to make a generation stand out?
Wouldn't it be wonderful if there was a youth movement that appealed to all young people and encouraged them to lay down weapons, to stop the violence among gangs in cities, to stop the bullying within schools/colleges, and to start to pay forward small, positive actions to help others! Wow! Wouldn't that be fantastic. Then the 'noughties' would go down in history as the era when our young generation stopped the violence in Britain and lead by example for others to follow! Now, that's my dream.
If you could turn back time is there anything you would change and why?
Actually, I've given this question a lot of thought. With hindsight I now know how precious the years were when my children were growing up and I would like to go back and rethink some of my priorities. I tried to work around my children but that wasn't always possible. However, I don't think there is anything else I would change, not even the bad times, because all those experiences have helped to make me who I am today. I am still learning and hope I don't ever stop!
What are the biggest pressures of the world for teenagers do you think? And how can they be resolved?
In my humble opinion I think young people today have huge pressures to live with. Apart from the current economic crises where young people are not guaranteed to find employment or work experience, they also have to live with enormous peer pressure! I think there has also been too much emphasis on academia and not enough on vocational studies for far too long! This is now slowly changing but there is still a stigma attached to those qualifications that are not deemed to be academic - that is SO wrong! Young people are more pressured to 'reach for the stars' - there is nothing wrong with being competitive but when this competitiveness takes over and anything less than a top score is not acceptable, then this can have a detrimental affect on that young person. There is nothing wrong with trying your best - but neither should a young person feel a failure for not achieving that A*!
There are tough times ahead for all generations in this country but I think our teenagers are going to find it much harder to get on the employment ladder. We all need to rethink priorities, we all need to rethink values! We all need to start to take responsibility for our actions and lead by example, old and young!
For more information on BigPinkHearts visit our website http://www.bigpinkheart.co.uk/hello.asp
